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05 June 2008 @ 09:36 pm
Introductory ficlet?  
Hi, I've just stumbled into the realm of "Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang," and I'm loving it pretty hardcore. I just can't get enough. I don't have much to offer, but I knocked up this little ficlet for an RDJ fic-a-thon that th_esaurus initiated over on her journal. I don't really know anyone else who would enjoy fanfiction about the film, so I thought I might as well offer it up for your enjoyment.

It's untitled, PG-13 rating for language and general gayness, but gen in nature. Lost on the road, Harry tries to have a heart-to-heart with Perry. 581 words. Any and all comments very welcome.

Perry guides the car onto the shoulder of the road and we come to a stop. “Just hand me the map. It’s in the glove box.”

I pop the glove box open and riffle around until I find the map. He snatches it out of my hand and starts unfolding it, muttering to himself. He used to keep that little gun in here, but it’s gone now, replaced with a CD of Celine Dion’s Greatest Hits.

“Do you ever—” I stop, maybe out of self-preservation, out of the ingrained instinct I have that Perry is going to hit me for asking a stupid question.


“What what?”

He rolls his eyes. “If you’re going to waste my time asking inane questions, at least ask them, don’t just leave them hanging.”

“Well, no, it’s just, I mean, I was wondering. Do you ever, like, I mean, does it ever get lonely?”

“Does what ever get lonely, Harry?”

“Being gay.”

“Oh, no.”


“No, we are not having this conversation.”

“Bu—Why not?”

“This is not a conversation we are going to have. Ever.”

“What is your problem?”

Perry laughs, and it’s not a very nice sound. “My problem is you, you fucking idiot.”

“Well, no, but—”

He does that thing with his hands where it looks like he wants to strangle me. “If I wanted to pour my heart out to someone—which isn’t likely, by the way—don’t you think I’d pick someone a little more sympathetic?”

I look down at my knees. That hurts, a little. “It’s just, I was thinking about what you said about the Dillinger.”

“Derringer,” he corrects. Then he sighs, and I have to smile a little, because I knew he couldn’t just leave it at that. “What about the Derringer?”

“How you called it, you know . . .”

“My faggot gun?” He raises his eyebrows, like a challenge. Sometimes, even now that we’ve known each other a while, he still enjoys throwing it in my face, the whole gay thing, just to get a rise out of me.

“Yeah. That. And I was just thinking . . . I dunno.” I shrug. I didn’t think when I started this line of conversation about how, well, how gay it would sound actually coming out of my mouth. “That just seems like a really lonely thing. Using someone a couple of times and—and—“

“Oh, please,” Perry scoffs. “As if you weren’t doing exactly the same thing before you met Harmony.”

“Well, yeah, and it fucking sucked. You know?” I look at him, watching his face for some kind of reaction. “It sucked, and I wanted to stop—settle down, find a nice girl. Don’t you ever want to—well, not with a girl, obviously, but, uh, you know, with a person of the appropriate gender.”

Perry shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter.”

“You know, technically, that doesn't actually answer my question.”

“It’s not technically any of your fucking business who I fuck, or settle down with, or—anything.”


“Just leave it alone, Harry. OK? Can you do that?”

I think, for a minute, that Perry looks—not sad, exactly. I don’t really have a word for that expression. Kind of like how, for a straight guy, there's pink and there's purple, and nothing really in between? How fuschia and magenta and violet are colors only visible to women and gay men? It's kind of like that, like that expression is off my emotional spectrum. But I know enough not to push it any further, so I just say, “Yeah, sure. Sorry. Forget I ever said anything.”

“Gladly,” Perry says. “Now, it looks like all we have to do is double back for about half a mile and there should be a ramp that’ll get us back onto the highway."
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: "Alpha Beta Gaga" - AIR
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like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 04:49 am (UTC)
Aw, thank you! You're very kind. I'm glad it didn't seem too out of character. A companion piece is a really nice idea, but I don't know--I'm not sure I can do Perry justice. He is, as you say, a hard nut to crack. I'll have to have a think about it. But, yes, thanks for the warm welcome!
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like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 11:00 am (UTC)
I am not unaware of this thing of which you speak. I'm very tempted--I just don't want to sign up for anything I can't follow through on, because that's not very nice, is it? But it's definitely on my mind. And I'm very excited to see the results of this challenge. Oh, and also--I, too, am acquainted with that math teacher. I think he taught at a lot of schools.
Jesscsi_sanders1129 on June 6th, 2008 03:18 am (UTC)
Seconding that companion piece idea. This was lovely, and sad, and perfect, and very in character for the boys. Love the colors, bit. Lol.

Welcome to the comm!
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 04:51 am (UTC)
Thank you! I'm glad it's a little sad, I wasn't sure that worked, but it's nice to hear. And thanks, it's nice to be here!
what you're saying is you just didn't: KKBB - Jonny Gossamerbohemu on June 6th, 2008 03:35 am (UTC)
Oh, that was so good. I love general fic and this is so very in character, for both of them really. :D
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 04:52 am (UTC)
You know, it's rare for me not to want to slash the hell out of characters, but I feel like their dynamic is just so good already, I almost don't feel the need to mess with it. Almost. Heheh. Anyway--Thank you. I'm glad you liked it!
what you're saying is you just didn't: KKBB - Such contemptbohemu on June 6th, 2008 06:30 am (UTC)
I think you hit the nail on the head. Lately I've been finding myself slipping slowly away from slash as a whole, but it never really occurred to me with these two. And it might just be that their dynamic is so awesome as it stands now, it doesn't really need it.
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 11:05 am (UTC)
I think sometimes that the urge to slash arises from some sort of undertone of tension or closeness between characters that people (I mean, the author/director/whatever) are too heterocentric or square or something to acknowledge. But in this case, it's acknowledged and addressed really elegantly. I dunno, not to get too heavy or anything. On another note, though? Your icon is brilliant--where on earth did that come from?
what you're saying is you just didn't: KKBB - Perry/Harmonybohemu on June 9th, 2008 08:48 pm (UTC)
That's a good description of slash. Interesting. And yeah, that picture is from one of the premieres or photo calls for KKBB. There's a lot of premiere/photocall pictures of those two making out, and Michelle laughing nearby :P
justalurker: Reach4Moonkagerune on June 6th, 2008 05:13 am (UTC)
Awwww they both need hugs. Since we're not around to do it, maybe they should hug each other.
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 10:55 am (UTC)
Aww, heheh, maybe they should. Thanks--I'm glad you enjoyed it!
noctuabundanoctuabunda on June 6th, 2008 09:59 am (UTC)
*sniffles* Aw man. Poor Perry. I loved the line about the emotional spectrum, and they were both perfectly IC.
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 10:56 am (UTC)
Thank you, that's very nice to hear!
xel: harryxperry mezzimortixel1980 on June 6th, 2008 03:02 pm (UTC)
Gods, I totally love it! <3
Thanks for sharing! <3
like "castle"cassyl on June 6th, 2008 11:33 pm (UTC)
My pleasure. Thank you!
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like "castle"cassyl on June 8th, 2008 04:34 am (UTC)
Heheh, thanks. I don't think I really came up with that on my own, a lot of people have made that joke, I think, in various forms, but by all means, spread it around. I'm glad you enjoyed, thanks for saying so.
charakitaicharakitai on June 8th, 2008 08:31 pm (UTC)
Hee, Dillinger. Seems very Harry to hear that instead - I can easily see him harboring a fascination for the depression era gangsters as a kid, together with the Gossamer novels. He's a bit of a romantic like that, no?

It also seems very much like Harry to get such a "stupid" question in his head, and how he suddenly just needs to offer Perry emotional tech support, though he knows it will bring him nothing but insults, just in case.

And it's also very Perry to be irritated/uncomfortable with the whole thing...

So yeah, I thought it was great. Wouldn't mind to read more.

like "castle"cassyl on June 8th, 2008 10:00 pm (UTC)
Heh, it just felt like one of those honest mistakes people make, replacing a lesser-known word with a more common one. But now that you've said it, I do kind of love the idea of Harry as a crime buff. He is very much a romantic like that.

And, yeah, I just really love awkward/hesitant bonding, like the scene where Perry tells Harry not to "steal any more shit." I love scenes where people really ware about each other but are too wrong-headed or stubborn or repressed to just come out and say it.

But in any case. Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Vviciouscats on June 15th, 2008 08:48 pm (UTC)
What a lovely ficlet! Thank you so much for writing and sharing.
like "castle"cassyl on June 16th, 2008 02:06 am (UTC)
Aw, what a lovely comment! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for saying so!
newtypeshadow: KKBB - Perry and Harrynewtypeshadow on March 27th, 2009 11:02 pm (UTC)
This made me sad and ridiculously happy to read. Sad because, well, Harry-as-confidant is totally rejected; happy because it was well-written, and I can definitely see this happening.

I'm glad your hardcore love of the film yielded fanfiction! I'm new to the fandom, and I'm loving it and the film pretty hardcore too. ♥